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Damned Trucks
The doctor told a man that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the act. The man decided, "What the heck, I'll try it."

He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it, couldn't do it in his office. Thought about the restroom, but that was too open, considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe. Finally, he realized his solution.

On the way home from work, he pulled his truck over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as if examining the truck. Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to masturbate. He closed his eyes and thought of his lover.

As he grew closer to orgasm, he felt a quick tug at his pant leg. Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, he kept his eyes shut and replied, "What?"

He heard, " This is the police. What in the hell are you doing?"

The man replied, "I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted."

The cop says, "Well, you better check your brakes too, because your truck rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago."

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